The Multiplex Mind

Each second I stared into her eyes, the time melted to form the minutes that passed by. The longer my retinas stared into hers the finer the details became. Not only was I able to notice the number of individual eyelashes and evergreen ring around the edges of each iris. I was able to listen to her vulnerable heart through my own. It’s not a love story, it’s the basic desire for human connection that motivates the drive of our beings. 

I was at dance and my teacher was having us carry out an exercise that required two people to stare into each other’s eyes for ten minutes. The value behind the activity for dance specifically was meant to bring out our performance quality and open ourselves up to the audience emotionally. Afterwards we shared our experiences, what we noticed, what we thought and how we felt. Although I performed the exercise with a close friend of mine I found comfort easily in the understanding that as I shared unspoken parts about myself with her she was sharing parts of her story with me. In that moment our shared vulnerability became a deeper outlook on self and sparked the desire to utilize that ability to perform. 

I was never a good listener and once I realized my weakness I understood where the start to my progress would develop from.  A mere part of the complexity within myself is the steps I’ve taken to become a better listener, through the multitude of observations I’ve taken the time to construct and understand. My captured observations include others signature behaviors, self motivations, and the interactions with different people. However little comes close to the observations of human connection and the weighted affect it has on other’s behavior. People can be the independent variable to create the result of ones dependent actions and creation in character. In the end, the molds of every experience we shape into ourself are the parts we wish to connect with others. This may not have made much sense but I want the reader to understand complexity in my mind comes with open mindedness in my being. I wish to understand the intricate ties each person holds on to from others and the knots that have embedded themselves within. As these ideas accumulate in my mind at 2:28 in the morning I ask myself why I burden the experiences of others lives on my own. I answer with the knowledge of my hearts desire to drive life forward by the collective understanding of myself and others around me.